iamaproductofme

Jokes-Tips-Advice Did you hear about the panda who lost his food?
He was Bamboozled…

Jokes-Tips-Advice I saw two cats fighting on my way to work this morning.
My van broke it up.

Jokes-Tips-Advice If you ever get attacked by a tiger just throw moisturiser cream at him.
Blocks the paws.

Jokes-Tips-Advice It is advised that if confronted by a bear you should drop to the ground, stay silent, act submissively and wait until it’s lost interest in you before you move.
Respect to the blatant rapist, who clearly wanders forests dressed in a bear suit, for releasing this ‘advice’ to the world.

Jokes-Tips-Advice Dear Moths,
Okay so you live for about a week.
Why don’t you go see the London eye or see how far you can get round the world?
Please stop hanging around in my bedroom and also feeling the necessity to nose dive at my phone as I type this…
Thanks

Jokes-Tips-Advice BEWARE….
Clothing for bee’s

Jokes-Tips-Advice My Father said that he is so fed up of all my pets, the next one I get he is going to drown.
I’m seriously considering getting a shark.

Jokes-Tips-Advice “It’s not the size of the dog in the fight, it’s the size of the fight in the dog.”
Try telling that to the owner of the little terrier, down the road, that just had it’s throat ripped out by a rottweiler.