diets

Jokes-Tips-Advice I work in Tech support for a computer company, if I was a mechanic, most of the conversations would go like this.
Customer: My car isn’t working and I need you to fix it immediately, this is an emergency
Mechanic: Alright sir what seems to be the problem?
Customer: I don’t know, I tried to use my car on friday and it didn’t work, now it’s monday and I need to get to work and I can’t and this needs to be fixed right now.
Mechanic: Can you start the car? Can you even get into your car? Does it make any sounds when you try to start it? Are all 4 tires there?
Customer: I don’t know, I don’t know what any of that stuff means, I tried to get to work and it wouldn’t let me and you need to fix it now because you changed my oil 6 months ago.
Mechanic: Alright well what kind of car are you driving?
Customer: I don’t know, a green one, why does that matter?
Mechanic: Please take a look at the back of your car and see if there are any letters or numbers that would indicate a vehicle model or manufacturer
Customer: Ok, my car is a SV2 87K.
Mechanic: No sir that’s your license plate. My records indicate that you drive a Nissan Altima, can you confirm that the key you’re using to try and get into this car says Nissan on it?
Customer: My key says Lexus but I don’t see how that makes a difference, I’ve been using this key on this car for years and it’s always worked, what did you do to my car?

Jokes-Tips-Advice Some kids were having a water fight on the street earlier, so I rushed out with the element of surprised and squirted all of their faces.
Then I got my Water-Gun out.