Jokes-Tips-Advice Calling it “Little Chef” is false advertising, isn’t it?
I think “Mong with a Microwave” would be more fitting.

Jokes-Tips-Advice Just bought a trifle for easter from tesco. There was a little notice saying the instructions were on the underside.
Instructions: 1. DO NOT TURN OVER
Every little helps.

Jokes-Tips-Advice I have just proposed to my girlfriend with an onion ring.
She cried, bless her.

Jokes-Tips-Advice I took this girl to a fancy restaurant and tried to impress her by ordering in Italian.
It was awkward. Apparently there’s no Italian word for Lamb Biryani.

Jokes-Tips-Advice I saw the spirit of Keith Floyd in my local Tesco this morning.
14.99 a bottle.

Jokes-Tips-Advice As a black law graduate I now have to attend 12 formal dinners in order to progress to the next stage of my career.
And once I?ve done these McDonald’s have promised to put me in charge of fries.

Jokes-Tips-Advice The traditional Haggis recipe is quite simple.
1) Turn a sheep inside out.
2) Cook.

Jokes-Tips-Advice Carlsberg do make Lager, it’s probably the worst in the world