Jokes-Tips-Advice So Africans have to walk 15 miles every day just for a bucket of water.
I always wondered how they managed to stay thin.

Jokes-Tips-Advice I hear that spam is making a comeback which I’m really pleased about. I’ve been eating it every day of my life, cooked in a pan with a little bit of oil, but just lately I’ve started to wonder……am I frittering my life away?

Jokes-Tips-Advice The McRib is vaguely shaped like a rack of ribs in the same way that people who eat it are vaguely shaped like people

Jokes-Tips-Advice “Once you go black, you never go back!” I shouted as I threw my 3 week old bananas in the bin…..

Jokes-Tips-Advice I bought a frozen pizza from Asda the other day and it said on the box, “Cook for between 20 and 22 minutes.”
Now, I’m not a genius, but isn’t that 21 minutes?

Jokes-Tips-Advice I walked home with a skip in my step today.
Accidentally stood on a packet of crisps.

Jokes-Tips-Advice When it comes to breakfast, 3 bowls of porridge is the bear minimum.

Jokes-Tips-Advice Told the wife to get her glad rags on tonight as I’m taking care of dinner, and I’ve promised her ‘The Ritz’
I’ve never seen anyone get so excited over a box of crackers before.